What many people do not recognize is that managing anger is a skill. While the emotion of anger is experienced throughout all humanity, the expression of the emotion varies greatly, depending on ones learned coping skills.
Without good coping skills, unbridled anger can become dangerous and devastating in relationships. Like any skill, it must first be taught, assimilated, then practiced many times. Then the skill should be monitored by a professional for guidance or suggestions. Learning to manage anger is like learning to play golf, you must first learn proper technique, then practice repetitively until mastered.
Skills might include improving communication, empathy, judgment and impulse control, expectations and stress management. These skills can be effectively learned by taking an anger class or online class, or through one/one anger management coaching by a trained professional. Anger management should be viewed as an educational intervention aimed at improving ones interpersonal skills.
Again, I use the word “skills” because that is what anger management is all about, skill enhancement. One will not master how to better control their anger response through magic. It happens with hard work and diligence at practicing the skills taught in a quality program.
Managing anger is also about ones own anger not the other persons. There is nothing you can do to improve someone else’s behavior. This type of training is all about self-improvement. The better you represent yourself to the ones around you, the better chance you have of the interaction being positive!
Ari Novick, Ph.D. is Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and a certified anger management provider for both adults and adolescents. Dr. Novick is also an adjunct professor of psychology at Pepperdine University’s Graduate School of Education and Psychology. His corporate website is http://www.ajnovickgroup.com and his innovative online anger management class is available at http://www.angerclassonline.com